Remember to Include a Holiday Schedule in Your Parenting Plan

The holidays are a time to be around family. However, they can also bring stress to divorced and separated parents when it comes to who gets to share these special days with the kids. For instance, both parents might want to spend Christmas morning with the children, ring in the new year with them, or create Thanksgiving dinner memories. Disputes over the holiday custody schedule can be avoided by addressing these issues in advance in a well-drafted parenting plan.

How to Address Holiday and Vacation Scheduling in a Parenting Plan

Courts in Missouri encourage parents to work together to create a parenting plan that will ensure the best interests of their child are met — this includes having a holiday custody schedule in place. Parenting time for all major holidays should be addressed in the plan, such as Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter, Independence Day, Halloween, and New Year’s Eve. In addition, there should be a schedule in place for religious holidays, school vacations, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, and special days like birthdays.

There are many options parents may consider to ensure that the holiday traditions of both sides of the family are honored and the child gets to spend quality time with each parent. Some common holiday custody schedule arrangements can include the following:

• Alternating holidays each year — A common way for parents to compromise regarding the holiday custody schedule is alternating the holidays each year. One parent might have a specific holiday in even years, and the other in odd years.
• Splitting the holidays in half — When co-parents live close to each other, it may be possible to split the day of the holiday in half. For example, one parent might spend the holiday morning with the children and the other might get the evening.
• Assigning specific holidays to a parent — If a holiday is particularly important to a parent, they might celebrate that holiday with the child every year. This arrangement can reduce uncertainty and provide consistency for the child.
• Celebrating the holiday twice — If one parent has the child on the actual holiday, the other might plan a celebration on a separate day. This can not only allow both parents to have quality time with the child, but the child may also get to enjoy celebrating the holiday twice.
• Following the regular custody schedule — Holidays can be split between co-parents based on the regular custody schedule that is in place during the year. This means that if a holiday falls on a Wednesday, whoever normally has parenting time on that day would get to spend the holiday with the child.

If parents are amicable, they might consider spending the holidays together with their child. This can provide the child with a sense of stability — especially if they are young. Being with both parents on these significant days can reduce the emotional impact of divorce during the transitional period and help a child feel secure.

Using Mediation to Determine the Holiday Custody Schedule

Mediation can be a crucial tool to help parents create a holiday custody schedule. It provides a neutral environment where parents can feel comfortable voicing their needs and concerns. A third party, called a mediator, guides the discussion and facilitates healthy communication between co-parents as they work to create a schedule that meets the child’s best interests.

In mediation, parents can work to create a customized agreement and find solutions that might not be available in the courtroom. Although a parenting plan should allow for flexibility, it must also be detailed to minimize the potential for disputes. Apart from specifying where the child will spend the holiday, other aspects that should be addressed in a parenting plan can include travel time, communication between co-parents to make arrangements for the visit, and how any disagreements that may arise will be handled.

It’s always best for parents to negotiate a parenting plan between themselves. If an agreement cannot be reached concerning the holiday custody schedule — or any other aspect of the parenting plan — it may be necessary to bring the matter into the courtroom to let a judge decide the case. A judge would consider a broad scope of factors outlined by statute to determine what is in the best interests of the child.

Contact an Experienced Missouri Divorce and Family Law Attorney

If you are facing a custody dispute or require assistance creating a parenting plan, it’s vital to consult with an experienced divorce and family law attorney who can protect your rights and help ensure the best interests of your child are met. Divorce and family law attorney Mark A. Wortman offers reliable representation to clients in the greater Kansas City, Missouri area for divorce and a broad scope of family law matters. To schedule a confidential consultation to learn how he can assist you, please contact him today online or by calling (816) 523-6100.